Solomon

Solomon woke me up every night between 415am and 645am to be fed. Sometimes, whether he needed it or not. That was our schedule. 

Last night, January 26 2014 was the first night I've ever spent in my home without him. We have spent nights apart but if I am at our house, he is there. No exceptions. Not until last night, hours following his departure. 

It's the night after now and I still don't know how to get ready for bed without him. I hate being in this house. His house. Surrounded by everything we loved together. I hate it here. I hate it and I long to stay here and never leave so that his hair and breath and life never leaves me. 

I miss my baby. My boy. So brave. My Solomon. I miss you. I miss you. I love you. I have always loved you. And I will love you until I meet you in the place beyond our eyes, my love. My only love. Only.